A few weeks ago, I was sitting at home on a gorgeous Carolina blue day. It was spring break鈥攁nd I was in burnout recovery mode.
I felt it consciously, deeply. This year has been oh-so-tough, for myriad reasons.
I also found myself wondering: Is burnout contagious in schools? Because it certainly seems pervasive. As we head into summer, I know my colleagues are feeling the strain of testing and staying motivated for themselves and their students. I鈥檓 far, far from being alone.
Let鈥檚 take a closer look at this phenomenon that every teacher suffers鈥攁nd rethink how we approach burnout.
What Is Burnout?
Teaching is one of the most visceral jobs I鈥檝e ever experienced. It鈥檚 emotionally, physically, and mentally consuming. I often find myself worried about how to reach every student, or wracked with guilt because I鈥檝e let my work/life balance shift in favor of work.
I know what needs to be done to be successful, but there is simply too much to do. Still, I keep clawing my way back. Because in teaching, you can never do enough.
But that kind of constant, intracranial hammering is not sustainable. In order to address it, we have to define what burnout looks like. Then we can attack it.
Recognize these signs?
- Exhaustion. This is a fatigue so deep that there鈥檚 no way to 鈥渢urn it off,鈥� no matter how badly you want to. It鈥檚 deep in your bones. The kind of tired where you just want to ooze into your bed and disconnect from life.
- Extreme graveness. Realizing you go hours without smiling or laughing, or days without a belly laugh.
- Anxiety. The constant, nagging feeling that you can and should do more, while simultaneously realizing you need to unplug and spend more time with your family. But there are so many things to do.
- Being overwhelmed. Questioning how they can possibly add one more task, expectation, or mandate to your plate. Compromising your values of excellence just so you can check-off 15 more boxes to stay in compliance. All the while knowing it still won鈥檛 be enough.
- Seeking. Losing your creativity, imagination, patience, and enthusiasm for daily challenges. Craving reflection time and productive collaboration rather than group complaining.
- Isolation. Wanting to head for the deepest, darkest cave where no one will see your vulnerability. A place where your limits are unseen and unquestioned and all is quiet.
Emerging Stronger
Burnout has visited me in full force twice this year. It鈥檚 brought me to the edge of my sanity, wrenched emotions out of me when I felt I could give no more, and sapped energy from the depths of my bones.
But guess what: I鈥檓 all right. I鈥檓 still here. I鈥檓 learning as I go鈥攁nd learning as I let go. And I鈥檓 actually thankful for its visits.
Here are a few lessons I鈥檝e learned from dealing with burnout in the past few months.
1. Sfumato. One of Leonardo da Vinci鈥檚 is known as Sfumato, Italian for 鈥渟moked,鈥� or 鈥済oing up in smoke.鈥� This principle is the ability to embrace uncertainty, the unknown, and the unknowable. In my interpretation, it鈥檚 also an ability to 鈥渓et go鈥� of everything that鈥檚 left undone when you know you鈥檝e done your best. Embrace Sfumato.
2. Balance. In yoga, those lithe bodies in stretching poses are beautiful to behold鈥攜et the beauty stems from a tension of opposites. In yoga, muscles compromise to support others, meaning that balance is not a matter of symmetry as much as support. That鈥檚 a lesson we can extend from our internal selves in order to seek out a supportive community.
3. Self. I鈥檓 human. It鈥檚 not selfish to address my own needs or say 鈥渘o鈥� once in a while. My job, as much as I love it and thrive upon its challenges, is not everything I am. I am more than my job. I need my creative outlets鈥攄rawing, nature, reading, writing, and playing鈥攊n order to be whole and wholly present for others.
4. Relationships. Friends, family, and faith are critical. Time away from work is best for me to recharge鈥攚ithout distractions of work staring at me from home. Small adventures with my family and friends, exploring new ideas and places, writing notes, and sharing acts of gratitude are things that I need regularly. I鈥檓 also learning that asking for help is a sign of strength, not weakness.
5. Gratitude. Being present and intentional with your days, even for just a few breaths at a time, can give you a survivor鈥檚 lens for managing the problems at your doorstep. For me, it鈥檚 about having gratitude for the people in my life. Embracing the questions that underlie my curiosity. Remembering the passions that have driven me to and throughout my job. Holding a clearer vision of what it takes to make and keep me well.
6. Healing. Here鈥檚 my biggest takeaway. When I lift weights, my muscles undergo tiny tears, with temporary pain鈥攂ut the subsequent healing leads to stronger muscles. And the next time, I can handle a little bit more.
With these strategies, I鈥檝e learned to view the challenges of burnout through a new lens and rethink the 鈥済ifts鈥� it鈥檚 brought me.
Burnout has allowed me to emerge in a stronger form鈥攖o be more determined and focused on what鈥檚 most important to me in my relationships and my work. Now I see burnout as a reminder to address the things that my soul needs. And, although I鈥檓 far from perfect, I can now teach and lead others through these same feelings from a place of recognition and understanding.
For all of that, dear burnout, I am grateful.
