Ask a Psychologist will run biweekly during the summer.
What advice do you have for the end of the school year?
Finish strong! Here鈥檚 something I wrote about the topic for as a :
Even now, I have vivid memories of my last day of high school. Do you?
In my mind鈥檚 eye, I鈥檓 cleaning out my locker, then staring at the emptiness for a few extra beats before slamming it shut for the last time. I鈥檓 roaming the halls with my best friend, blissfully ignoring the bells going off every 50 minutes on schedule because, just today, we鈥檙e allowed to break the rules. I鈥檓 sitting on my desk, swinging my feet, and shooting the breeze with my English teacher, Mr. Carr, in a way that makes me feel almost grown up.
It鈥檚 maybe my favorite day of the whole year. And like the final layer of watercolor, the freedom and lightness I feel seeps into the rest of my memories of that day and turns them just a shade rosier.
If the school year hasn鈥檛 yet ended for your kids, consider what you can do to make the finale count. Why?
Because when it comes to human memory, not all moments are created equal. Instead, our remembered experiences are disproportionately influenced by peaks (the best moments as well as the worst) and endings (the last moments). Nobel laureate Danny Kahneman, who discovered this phenomenon, dubs this the of hedonic experience.
I took advantage of the peak-end rule years ago, when my girls were young enough to want a bedtime story each night. I remember thinking that whatever strife and stress had occurred that day, I could make the last moments count. I could end on a note of calm and act like the patient mom I hadn鈥檛 quite managed to be just hours before.
顿辞苍鈥檛 mistake all moments as equal in significance. There鈥檚 a reason why yoga classes end with savasana. There鈥檚 a reason we eat dessert last.
Do orchestrate endings. As Seattle Seahawks coach and (Character Lab adviser) Pete Carroll might say: Last impressions are especially lasting.
